Beer of the Weekend #237: Schell's Maifest

Today my grandma asked me, “Now, are you considered an alcoholic?” I was taken aback, but it was a fair question given how little beer she drinks (a can of Miller Lite every now and then when she eats pizza or chili) and how much beer I bought at the New Glarus Brewing Company today.

Behold my haul, two cases worth of Badger State goodness:


From top to bottom, left to right, I returned to IC with packs of Imperial Weizen, IIPA, Snowshoe Red Ale, Coffee Stout, Uff-da, a custom sixer, Totally Naked, and Dancing Man Wheat. According to my receipt, the subtotal was $66.

The Quiet Man? An alcoholic? Nah.

Obviously, I visited New Glarus today. My parents had the day off, so they tagged along. We picked up my grandma on the way and also visited the little southwestern Wisconsin towns of my dad’s youth and family history. Wisconsin is the shizznit, but staying too long in a place where landjägers are sold everywhere would drive me insane. (As I told friends last weekend, while enjoying a couple pitchers of John’s White Ale in Amana, landjägers are the only meat product I miss and am tempted to eat.) Then again, the beer and traditional beer culture (unlike what we have in Iowa) would probably keep me in the right frame of mind.

ANYWAY. On to the beer of the weekend, which has been sitting in my fridge for a week: Schell’s Maifest, brewed by the August Schell Brewing Company of New Ulm, Minnesota.


(It gives me great pleasure to introduce the newest member of my beerware collection: the New Glarus logo pilsner glass I bought today. Finally! — I have a real pilsner glass.)

Serving type: Six 12-ounce bottles. There is a definite freshness date (or so I think) printed on the neck: “072911.”

Appearance: Straight pour into a pilsner glass. The color is pale straw; there is a very slight chill haze, but for the most part it is clean and clear. Three fingers of thick, billowy head dissipated slowly, leaving trails of lace along the glass and a ring around the edge.

Smell: The nose is pretty weak and takes a lot of effort to detect, though there are definite notes of lemon citrus and strawberry. It has a disgusting hint of hair spray. Amazingly, I am also reminded of chardonnay and Meier’s Sparkling Apple.

Taste: The flavor is much the same, and reminds me a little of my very disappointing experience with Schell’s Oktoberfest last fall. It has a caramel foundation, but built on top is apple infused chardonnay, lemon citrus, strawberry, and Paul Mitchell for White Haired Old Ladies. At the end is a slight alcohol burn.

Drinkability: Wow. All I can think about right now is the five bottles of this still chilling in my fridge. How am I going to make myself drink them? The first bottle became tolerable after it warmed for about 10 minutes, but otherwise I was very disappointed. I hope it was a bad bottle.

Fun facts about Schell’s Maifest:

-Style: The Schell website calls it “Maibock, a blonde dopple bock,” and BA classifies it as a Maibock/Helles Bock.

-Price: $7.99/sixer at John’s Grocery in Iowa City.

-Serving temperature: 45-50ºF.

-Alcohol content: 7.2 percent ABV.

-Food pairings: BA recommends Italian cuisine, German cuisine (landjägers — nooooo!), nutty cheeses (Asiago, Colby, Parmesan), fish, shellfish, and salmon.


The Quiet Man’s grade: D+.

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