Beer of the Weekend #900: Slurm Lord

It’s the big nine-zero-zero for Beer of the Weekend, and I have a little something special my boss had chilling in his fridge for me during my visit last weekend: Slurm Lord, brewed by the Short’s Brewing Company of Bellaire, Michigan. (I previously reported the location as Elk Rapids, Michigan. Elk Rapids is where Short’s has its production facility.)



The color is cloudy amber orange akin to orange or pineapple juice. A finger of buttery, bubbly, beige-colored head leaves a skim with spots of bubbles and a thin collar of bubbly foam.

The aroma is sweet, tropical, and inviting with scents of pineapple, mango, and orange. There is light toast and caramel, and there is also a note of berries, mostly raspberries.

The flavor is warming but not boozy. It is fruity and tropical but not bursting or juicy; it is not as strong or inviting as the aroma. There are muted flavors of pineapple, mango, orange, light caramel, and a touch of toasted malt. The beer’s description also mentions passion fruit, which I need to familiarize myself with. It is mellow and tasty, but it’s obvious it’s high gravity. It’s drinkable and pleasant, and I really want to try its non-double sibling.

Fun facts about Slurm Lord:

• Style: Double New England IPA.

• Price: It was a welcome and much appreciated gift.

• Alcohol content: 7.3 percent ABV.

• IBU: 17. The low IBU is definitely a surprise and very welcome. Give me flavor instead of bitterness!

• Calories (estimated): 263.

• My boss told me he bought it because of the label and name, though mostly the name if I remember correctly. Unfortunately, Short’s provides no backstory or explanation about either. It’s a shame, because I really want to know the story behind the label.

• I need to get my weight under control, so I’m going to do something I have never done before: count beer calories. I’ve counted all my other calories for a while (when possible) but never included beer calories—which more than likely derail all my attempts to lose weight. (I resolve to drop to 180 pounds at the beginning of every year but never do it.) No more.

Beer is more caloric than you think, according to this very informative article on
DRAFT. Here’s an eye-opening graph:

Last night I drank a pale ale (5.7%) and later a helles lager (5.2%). In my mind I had “just a couple of beers” but each was a half-liter (16.9 US ounces), and the very idea of counting their calories irritates me. But this is for science. So I ended up drinking, let’s see, about 460 calories. Or, I drank the equivalent of a bacon double cheeseburger. Which seems a bit unfair, since I didn’t choose to eat one.

How many calories are in beer? It varies based on style and alcohol content, but the article relays this formula for calculating a rough estimate for beer calories:

Ounces(ABV * 2.5)

The article recommends multiplying by 3 instead of 2.5 for sweeter beers, which is how I found the calorie estimate for a 12-ounce Slurm Lord: 263. (I’m rounding up because I’m a masochist.)


The Quiet Man’s grade: A-.

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