I Finally Watched: 'Once Bitten'

The movie I finally watched this weekend is a fun eighties comedy that features Jim Carrey’s first main movie role: Once Bitten.

Mark (Jim Carrey) is a horny 18-year-old whose girlfriend, Robin (Karen Kopins), is not ready to go all the way. Frustrated and eager to lose his virginity, he and two friends go to Hollywood hoping to get lucky. Instead, Mark falls prey to the countess (Lauren Hutton), a vampire who needs to drink the blood of a virgin to maintain her beauty and ageless state.

I admit that I’ve watched Once Bitten once before, but I was happy to watch it again before deleting it from my DVR. (I needed to take notes for this post too!) It’s a playful and enjoyable film, one I wanted to see when I learned it was Carrey’s first major role. I always thought his debut was Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, but I was wrong. Once Bitten even predates his involvement on In Living Color.

Once Bitten is clearly a comedy, unlike Teen Witch, which is more ambiguous despite the premise. (Teen Witch is not very funny—at least I don’t think so.) Once Bitten is openly outrageous and outlandish, jocular. Mark drives an ice cream truck, which Robin is understandably hesitant to lose her virginity in. (The reason Mark is driving an ice cream truck is never revealed, which is a bummer because I want to know!) In their introductory scene, Mark and Robin are parked at the local make-out spot, which is fittingly next oil pumpjacks, and all the other cars are rocking to the motion of the ocean. Mark’s two friends are annoyingly horny, work at an eccentric burger stand in a strip mall parking lot, and try to pick up women at a laundromat. One wears a sweatshirt with “FREELANCE GYNECOLOGIST” ironed on the front. It’s clear Once Bitten is a comedy and should be taken lightly—or maybe I get that sense because I saw it once before and know what to expect.

The movie is outdated in the sense that it takes a patriarchal view of sex and relationships. Viewers are supposed to feel sorry that Mark’s girlfriend won’t submit to his carnal desires whenever and wherever, her reservations be damned! It’s not uncharacteristic given the era, when the unreleased sexual urges of teenage boys were tapped ad nauseum for movie plots, but it’s hard not to see there’s another side to the couple’s story. This is Mark’s story, of course, so does that make it excusable? I think Once Bitten reframed from Robin’s perspective would be a very interesting and worthwhile story. Think about it: her boyfriend couldn’t wait, so she has to save him from a “button-eating slut” who happens to be a vampire. That premise sounds pretty intriguing, almost better than what happens in Once Bitten.

On that note, what was it about the eighties and turning teenagers into mythical creatures? The eighties seem to have that movie genre cornered. Have there been any worthwhile movies like Teen Wolf, Teen Witch, and Once Bitten since? Besides the Twilight series, which I have never seen, I can’t think of any.

Whether the perspective of Once Bitten can be considered patriarchal or not does not change the fact there is one scene that is woefully outdated and cringe-worthy because of its blatant homophobia. The shower scene in question is unlike anything I have ever seen on at least two levels, but the homophobia and shaming it depicts sadly fit the era as well. Much like eighties movies loved turning unsuspecting teens into mythical creatures, they loved bashing homosexuals. Why? I have no clue, but teen movies from the eighties make it clear that homosexuality was considered abnormal and free game for ridicule back then.

The countess’s annual search for a virgin is becoming harder as virgins become scarcer—no doubt a commentary about loosening social mores. “Virgin blood isn’t easy to come by these days,” she laments at one point, adding, “Being a vampire in the 20th century is a nightmare.” (At least for vampires who need virgin blood. None of the other vampires in the movie are complaining.) It all heightens Mark’s feelings of inadequacy. Even the bookseller Robin speaks to—who conveniently knows a lot about vampires—says that “an 18-year-old boy would hardly be a virgin.” How true is the film’s (lighthearted) critique? I don’t think of the eighties as being a promiscuous decade, especially in light of the rise of AIDS and HIV. It’s not a very sexy decade in retrospect, at least in my opinion. (Too much big hair, I guess.) It was the decade of the Moral Majority and the rising political influence of the Christian right, as well as Tipper Gore and the Parents Music Resource Center. Granted, Once Bitten was released halfway through the decade, and I have the perspective of history, but it does present a different viewpoint. Of course, Once Bitten is a comedy—not Apocalypse Now. I should stop trying to make the move into something it’s not.

Once Bitten features a glimpse of what was to come for Jim Carrey. His mannerisms and expressions are now very familiar, but they were likely introduced to many in Once Bitten. Mark exhibits hints of Lloyd Christmas and Ace Ventura. There are also hints of Carrey’s Canadian roots. An elongated vowel sneaks into his lines now and then.

Speaking of lines, Once Bitten is a one- and two-liner factory reminiscent of Schwarzenegger shoot ‘em ups. Along with the countess’s two lines above, there are these gems:

• “There’s too much pressure about getting laid. It’s like taking a driver’s test for manhood.”

• “I’m so old, I can’t remember my own sign.”

• “I have to replace every door you people smash. Can’t you at least try the knob first?”

The best lines in the movie belong to Robin, though: “Mark doesn’t want you, because you’re mean and evil. He wants me, because I’m nice, sweet, and pure. So fuck off!”

Here are some additional, itemized notes:

• Dominick Brascia, the actor who played Joey in Friday the 13th: A New Beginning, makes a cameo appearance during the scene at the make-out spot. He asks Mark for ice cream. He may be eating something similar immediately before his demise in A New Beginning.

• Once Bitten has a corny but very infectious theme song—perhaps another cue that the movie is a comedy.

• Robin is way too forgiving of Mark. She’s upset that he supposedly slept with a women he met at a bar in Hollywood, but she shrugs it off after he throws a few wise cracks and goofy moves her way.

• Mark and his friends visit a telephone bar, where each table has a phone to contact other tables. It’s notable because (1) it’s a telephone bar and (2) the boys, who are all presumably 18 years old, order and drink beer. Once Bitten was produced and released before the National Minimum Drinking Age Act took effect, coaxing states to make 21 their minimum drinking age. Interestingly, the drinking age in California has been 21 since 1933, so Mark and his friends were not drinking legally.

• I thought the channel guide description for Once Bitten was clever but slightly off the mark: “A vampire countess in need to new blood finds a high-school couple with the right type.”