Weighing in on Big Ten expansion, Part 2

Today, after three weeks of contemplation, I came to the conclusion that the novel outline I started April 6 is an aimless mess.

After 18,070 words, I still have no clue where the story is going. I don’t even know what the fuck I’m writing about. (Non-writers may not understand this, but pieces have a knack for gaining a mind of their own and becoming uncontrollable, like Jean-Claude van Damme. At least mine do, anyway.) Needless to say, some serious soul-searching, focusing, and trimming are in order.

In the meantime, I need to write tonight. And what better, more compelling, subject to write about than Big Ten expansion…again.

If the Big Ten expansion rumor mill produced flower, it could feed the fucking world. I’m really tired of all the speculation, and, as I wrote Sunday, it looks to end Friday. Or sooner.

Newsflash from the Chicago Tribune:

The Big Red will be joining the Big Ten.

A source with knowledge of the expansion talks has confirmed to the Tribune that Nebraska will be invited to apply for Big Ten membership, a mere formality in the process. An announcement is expected Friday.

The league has not determined, the source said, whether it will remain at 12 schools or expand to 14.

Chip Brown of Orangebloods.com said on Sports Center, “The Big 12 is dead.” As many as six schools (Texas, Texas Tech, Texas A&M, Oklahoma, Oklahoma State, and maybe Colorado) will head to the Pac-10 to form the country’s first “super conference.” But that is, as with everything about conference expansion/collapse, just speculation. So-and-so heard this. So-and-so heard that. The president of such-and-such met with the football team… No announcements have been made so I’m holding my breath until then. I will welcome the Cornhuskers into the Big Ten family when they officially join the conference.

However, the expansion talk won’t stop even with the Nebraska situation settled. Will the conference be satisfied with 12 or make a push to 13 or 14? What will happen with the other expansion candidates?

According to the Trib, sources at Notre Dame said the school has “moved on” and assured the Big East it will continue competing in that conference…just not in hockey and football. So for now let’s take the ND option off the table.

(To tell you the truth, I really want ND in the Big Ten. The Irish were, and still could be, the best option for a twelfth member. They are the only natural fit. The Cornhuskers are a distant second. But the Pope is apparently unmoved by the Big Ten’s advances, so the conference needs to move on and let the padres in South Bend twiddle their thumbs and dream of adolescent boys.)

A jump by Nebraska obviously puts Missouri on the spot. ESPN’s Big Ten football blogger Adam Rittenberg wrote Mizzou is far from a lock, but if the Big 12 were truly dead you’d think the Tigers would have to consider a move to the Big Ten. What else could they do?

Tom floated a great idea: re-form the Big 8. Check it out: if Nebraska leaves for the Big Ten, and the Big 12 South leaves en masse (minus Baylor, plus Colorado) for the Pac-10, the remainder of the Big 12 North will be orphaned. Iowa State, Mizzou, K-State, and KU will be left in limbo. If they persuaded four more schools (say Baylor, TCU, Boise State, and maybe Utah), they could resurrect the Big 12’s predecessor. The football would potentially be incredible, and the basketball could be interesting. (Basketball, you have to admit, is right alongside academics in the expansion back seat.)

Or…the Annie’s of the Big 12 could jump to the Mountain West or WAC, which each has nine members. I’m sure both would welcome any orphan with open arms.

Like I said, things are going to get messy.

Here’s what no one is talking about: the expansion timeline. Football schedules are set years in advance, so if Nebraska were to join the Big Ten it wouldn’t start playing the Hawks or Illini until probably 2014. But I’m unsure. If the Big 12 were to dissolve perhaps all those conference schedules would go with it, and the Cornhuskers could be playing in Iowa City in 2011. Further complicating things is the contract the Big 12 just signed to play the conference basketball tourneys in Kansas City 2012 to 2016. What the hell happens with that? Money will likely be exchanged and the agreement will be voided.

Tonight my dad asked me, “Why does the Big Ten need to expand?” It doesn’t. It just wants more money, and the only way it can rake in additional revenue is by adding more members. A new school in a new state means more subscribes for the Big Ten Network and more advertising moola. It’s greed, pure and simple.

For the record, I like the Big Ten as it is. Though older folks may prefer the Big Ten proper, I prefer the conference with an “11” in the logo. (Penn State, in my opinion, has been an excellent addition.) If the Big Ten does expand I have no choice but to take it. Liking it is another matter, but I’m willing to give it a chance as everyone did 20 years ago.

One condition: no coach designed trophies this time.